Wednesday, May 15, 2019

Hiding Behind a Poker Face--Narcissist Abuse


HIDING YOUR THOUGHTS



Expressing our feelings after a very difficult and painful situation is a job in its self. We begin to pull away from people, friends family ect....

During this time of the abuse, we stayed quiet. Our laugh was so far out of our reach, it wasn't a thought, and talking about our situation isn't an option. Our silence took that part of us. We begin each day alone. Stuck with so many unanswered questions. Why did he have to abuse me? Why didn't he just leave? Why is he so angry? What did I do in my life to deserve this? What did I do to him? At this point, you don't care about love. Only how you were treated. No one has permission to do this to anyone.

Hiding our heartache we feel was the only way to deal with the unpleasant trauma. You ask why? I will tell you. No one understands unless they have been through this themselves. Let me ask you a question. Have you ever reached for a smile you couldn't find? The laughter you couldn't hear? A voice that couldn't speak?

Getting up was difficult, hesitating in the morning, but we do because we have to. We are not looking forward to questions from people, neither at our jobs or our personal life. As we go through our day, we begin to play a game with our feelings and walk around with a "Poker Face." Maintaining a neutral face, and protecting our feelings was a hard task.

For those of you who don't know. A "Poker Face" is one expression that hides your true feelings. A blank face, no joy, happiness or any facial remarks.

Time to grieve is a must under any circumstances letting the dust settle was highly effective for me. Not because of the loss of a man, but what I have endured. We need time to drain the poison that has been given to us. (The physical and emotional abuse that we dealt with. Nasty bitter anger, that came out of a miserable man.) That once held our happiness in the grips of his hands.

I came home from work one day it was late. Took a shower and settled in my room. No Television, no computer, no phone. I sat on my bed and began to pray. I got up the courage to ask the Lord what are my next steps. I told him I was very hurt the way I was treated. I cried, I told him everything that my heart was holding onto and asked him to take the pain from me. I did this every night I came home. I wanted to smile and laugh again. I missed it so much. I asked the Lord to help me put my life back together.

I took out my notebook and started writing down my prayers and what I asked of the Lord. I became stronger and healthier over time. I began to turn my world around. I was able to smile and laugh and find joy in things that I never knew existed. I spoke hope to my heart, and love to my life. I stood in faith and began to live the life I was meant to live. Praying helped me focus on my issue and find a solution. I have people gravitating to me from all over, wanting to know how I changed my life, and how they can start and change theirs.

Today I'm helping thousands of women change their lives with my personalized meditations. 

The biggest myth is people believing that they cannot shut off the noise long enough to meditate. Let me tell you a little secret. When the Meditation is personalized, you tune right into your life and solution. There isn't any sound that will affect this. It is the most incredible experience you will ever have.

Our meditations have changed the way people view healing and solving problems.  We are excited to share this with you. Click the link below the photo for more information.



If you are going through any difficulties. Please click this link, Let me guide you and help you take that next step in your life. You can email me with any questions, or concerns who may have.
https://valueurself.com/collections/personalized-meditations/products/personalized-meditations

amiliapowers@gmail.com


I look forward to working with you. 
Be blessed



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