The bottom line is, they live in their own world of fantasies. They play make-believe daily and forget what is true. This is where the narcissist out states their welcome. They trip up in their own lies and don't know what to do to get out of it. It's like peeling back an onion slice by slice, and all that is left are tears by the time you get to the center. Once the games are finished, the narcissist will never leave quietly. He will make a destructive exit. He must make up for you identifying him as a coward and a fraud. You are left shocked with disbelief that he tossed your life upside down to make himself look good, and blame everything that shattered on you.
Falling for the manipulation of a narcissist happens. I wanted to leave you with a way for you to identify what kind of man you're dealing with early enough so that this torment and pain doesn't enter your life.
1. The narcissist will never make you feel comfortable in a relationship. They will keep you on your toes. There isn't anything you will do well enough. They must have the upper hand. A narcissist gets the utmost pleasure in making you feel insecure. Having you in need gives them power and takes away yours which hands them full control.
Having stability in a relationship is the number one thing that keeps your love alive. You never have to look over your shoulder. You won't doubt yourself or feel devalued. Feeling secure with the one you love is precious.
2. The narcissist will never be grateful or thankful for what you do. To everyone, a narcissist will seem like the perfect guy. They love putting on a show in public. They have conditioned you to feel whatever happens in the house stays in the house. Unfortunately, you follow his rules. This will always make him look incredible to the outside. Never being a bad person, will ultimately backfire and make you the blame for all of the destruction once he leaves.
There will be days when your mind is wondering why he never praises your hard work and effort? Remember if he did this he will take the spotlight away from himself and he will not let that happen. A narcissist must have the credit even if it belongs to you. Feeling bad about this situation is exactly what drives him. Stop your Silence.
3. A narcissist will never have sympathy. They will not care if you had a bad day at work or your father is sick. There will be days when you are having a conversation about something troubling, and he will shut it down quickly as if you are making a big deal about nothing and it's not important. He doesn't care about your feelings. If it doesn't concern him, he doesn't want to be bothered. You are wasting his time.
This is not the love you dreamt of having in your life. You deserve happiness and joy, someone who will listen and would like to hear every word. Who will sympathize with you and have your back, good or bad? Life is full of challenges.
I'm a woman who's been through all of the things you are going through. A woman whose life was slammed against the wall. A woman's advice you can trust. A woman who found her way through the darkest times. Waking up praising God, and never giving up hope, and never giving up on me. I will never let you give up on you.