Thursday, September 24, 2020

3 Top Things a Narcissist Won't Stand For

                            

                            3 Things You Must Be Aware Of





I'm going to share with you something that I didn't notice that was happening to me. If you are in this situation right now, by reading this you will have the heads up to what to do next. 

Keep reading so you can actually see the unthinkable that leads to the moment of despair. The (3) things that a narcissist needs to survive. 

No matter if they are in a relationship or not, they must have these "Three Things" to detour their insecurities.

Unfortunately, because of this power struggle a narcissist has within themselves, we become a target of their emptiness and pain. 

We have left hurt and our life in disarray for meaningless recognition a narcissist feels he deserves. 


 Your Happiness Interrupts Their Attention

1. Feeling happy about your success or your children is a problem for the narcissist. If you are sharing excitement or joy the narcissist will feel threatened. The first emotion will happen. He will begin to become angry. He will find something or anything to argue about. It could be about the food you prepared or something that happened last week. 

The fight won't end there unfortunately, it will continue throughout the night, by either sending your grown kids back to their homes or send the kids to their rooms. He will begin to curse at you and find things that are wrong with you to make you feel terrible about yourself and what you're happy about. 

The sad part of this entire scenario you start to feel that everything that happened is all your fault. You begin to question yourself. Maybe I don't deserve the promotion and my boss felt bad for me. He could be right. The kids didn't work hard for their awards. Until he is satisfied with the attention he receives. The narcissist wins.


 How A Narcissist Needs Supply More Than Oxygen

2.  A narcissist runs his life on Attention, we have established this in 1. They become more dangerous and unpredictable when the thrill is over. When you were sought after, he would bring you flowers, and special gifts and kept the excitement alive in your relationship, until the day came when now you are living ordinary lives. Working, cleaning, and paying bills. To the realistic person this is all part of life and growing with each other and pulling together in good and bad times. Loving one another through all the challenges.

Wait...The narcissist doesn't live by this life. He needs the day you first met to continue in his life at all times. Unfortunately, a narcissist will go out and seek more supply. By supply, I mean more women, any woman who will listen and fall for his non-sense. They are actually running from themselves and their insecurities. They are gasping for air needing and wanting to feel validated and a center of someone's life. 

This will put you at an unnecessary point of unkindness. You will begin to see his ugly side come out. He will be frustrated and moody. He will make sure that you are not doing enough to make him happy. No matter how much you try to keep up with everything. In this turning point of your relationship, he has found someone else, and be ready for the abandonment stage. 

Two ways he will leave. He will leave by packing up and not say a word, and you will be left in limbo and breathless or he will leave a path of destruction behind. By destroying everything in your home and making false police reports. He does this, so his knew supply will be sympathetic and have her arms ready to embrace him. 

                                      
The Narcissist Will Not Tolerate The Word "No" 

3. A narcissist hates the word "no" more than anything else. Because they feel they are the center of the universe, that they believe no one has a right to say no to anything they suggest or say. Once you say this word to the narcissist, make sure you understand the repercussions. They find this to be an attack and a narcissist will not take this lightly. 

By not praising them, in the way they want can leave you in a dangerous position. They can go into a narcissistic panic and begin threatening you. Applying fear is their way to make you take a step back. In their eyes of delusion, they feel no one has the right to question anything they do or say. "How dare we!"

We must continue to stand up to what we believe in. They are nothing but bullies who think they have a right to push people around and make them bow down to their every whim. A narcissist is always on edge and ready for battle at every moment of their life. They have issues beyond what we can fix. It's like trying to repair shattered glass. This would make our life impossible for happiness, success, joy, and love.

I knew I didn't deserve a life of pain. I wanted my smile back, I wanted to hear myself laugh something I haven't done in so long. I knew it wasn't going to be easy, but it was a must to get away from him and never look back. I knew that the challenges I will be facing are just an obstacle towards freedom of torment and misery he put me through. This was worth getting out. 

Don't let comfort convince you that he is the one. I'm sure you have told yourself, he is everything you have been looking for in a man. Not if you have to go through this. Did you read what I wrote? Trying to convince someone to love you, and treat you amazing, will put you in a painful place. There is no happy ending here. This is not a fairy tale. 

Doing more for them to compensate for happiness will leave you broken, and won't change your situation. It doesn't matter what you do or try to do better. This isn't what love feels like. This is your happiness and love your compromising. Never forget who you are in any circumstance, most of all never let anyone control the love you have in your heart, and never give up wanting to live the life you are created to live. 

Begin today and make this change. Laugh, and smile embrace life's goodness, because you deserve it. If you're stuck, join thousands of women like yourself who have changed their lives with my Personalized Meditations created for your specific circumstance. This changed my entire life. It will change yours. 
 

Begin today by clicking the link on the bottom of the picture.




You will begin a new life of; Confidence Joy and Love. 
#amiliapowers #coffeewithamilia #meditations


Sunday, August 16, 2020

3 Signs You are a Victim of Narcissist Abuse

 

Understanding the Signs







1. You begin to attack yourself and cause self sabotage.

You begin to play scenes of the abuse over and over again in your mind to the point you hear the abuser's voice as it is still present at this very moment. 

You start to believe what the narcissist told you is true. You become ashamed of your life. The abuser has instilled in your mind that you are worthless and any dreams and hopes you have will never amount to anything worth pursuing. 

You inhaled all his toxic energy into your life. The unfortunate part of this self-sabotage is that you took complete responsibility for everything he's done. 


2. Blaming yourself for the abuse

Narcissists know how to manipulate you in believing that the abuse is caused because you are not enough. He will compare you with other wives and girlfriends of his friends and make you feel you are not holding up to the standards the abuser wants. 

You begin to feel less and less confident about yourself and you start to look for ways to change in order to keep him. The competition game you are playing with yourself seems endless. No matter what you try to do, he makes sure you know it's not enough by treating everyone around you with white gloves. 

He keeps you feeling on edge at all times as if he will leave you at any given moment. You start to wonder; "What can I do better?" "What's wrong with me?" Blaming yourself shines upon you. 


3. You suffer from health problems.

You find that stress is the biggest factor that has taken over your life. You forget to eat, or you eat too much. Anxiety kicks in because you don't know what could happen next and you're always on edge. 

Sleepless nights are happening on a regular basis, and you don't know if it's because you are malnourished or worried about your safety. 

Nightmares become a part of your rest. You wake up in night sweats or gasping for air. Your mind is on overdrive and you can't seem to slow it down. 

The only thing that keeps you going is coffee that you can't wait to have a lot of during the day. Being focused at this point is the hardest thing you had to do. 



WHAT DO I DO NOW?

I'm a woman who's been through all of the things you are going through. A woman whose life was slammed against the wall. A woman who found her way through her darkest hour. I never gave up hope. I never gave up on me. I will never give up on you.

I knew I didn't deserve a life of pain. I wanted my smile back, I wanted to hear myself laugh something I haven't done in so long. I knew it wasn't going to be easy, but it was a must to get away from him and never look back. I knew that the challenges I will be facing are just an obstacle towards freedom of torment and misery he put me through. This was worth getting out. 

Having love in our lives is amazing, but the right kind of love is very important. Don't waste another minute. There's nothing more exciting than a woman who is happy and has her voice, please remember that.

Reach out to me, and I will guide you through the process. I will answer all of your questions and concerns you have. 

You will begin a new life of; Confidence Joy and Love. 

Begin today, and leave me a message. 

Take your first step towards freedom.

amiliapowers@gmail.com

Visit me and Learn more about me:
www.valueurself.com
www.coffeewithamilia.com

I look forward to hearing from you.
Have a blessed day.
Amilia Powers








Thursday, August 13, 2020

Who Are You Convincing?



          
ARE YOU CONVINCING ME OR YOURSELF?






Did you ever have a conversation with a friend, and they tell you how wonderful and joyous their relationship is?

You know the story isn't true. You're the one who has picked up the phone in the middle of the night when she was upset, and you were there when she cried so much she couldn't catch her breath.

I was that person who reached out to friends and family day in and day out. The thoughts in my head were, this will pass. It will be alright. Tomorrow is another day. I knew I was well supported in every way good or bad. No matter what the circumstances. In my heart, I hoped one day he would change and things would be different. 

I would sit in silence and tell myself over and over that he will treat me better it's just a phase, and I'm focusing too much on the negative.

What I was actually doing was trying to convince myself that I was with the right person. 

When we Invest so much time in a person, our energy our love our kindness. Even when the relationship goes sour, we find ourselves never giving up, we become determined to find good in our situation and stay even though it hurts. 

It doesn't make sense to most people. As females, when we share our heart with a man we take it seriously, and we do what we can to hold our relationship, and families together. 

The most important thing we must do is stop working with our heart and our emotions when it comes to our happiness and joy. 

Your asking what do I mean? If we direct our thoughts on what is happening in our lives and leave emotion out of it. We will recognize that the relationship we are in is unhealthy and doesn't make us or our family stronger together. It will eventually tear us apart. How long can we play the convincing role with ourselves and the people around us? It get's exhausting.

Don't let comfort convince you that he is the one. I'm sure you have told yourself, he is everything you have been looking for in a man. Not if you have to go through this. Did you read what I wrote? Trying to convince someone to love you, and treat you amazing, will put you in a painful place. 
There is no happy ending here. This is not a fairy tale. 

Doing more for them to compensate for happiness will leave you broken, and won't change your situation. It doesn't matter what you do or try to do better. This isn't what love feels like. 

This is your happiness and love your compromising. 

Never forget who you are in any circumstance, most of all never let anyone control the love you have in your heart, and never give up wanting to live the life you are created to live.

Begin today and make this change. Laugh, and smile embrace life's goodness, because you deserve it. If you're stuck, join thousands of women like yourself who have changed their life with my Personalized Meditations created for your specific circumstance. 

This changed my entire life. It can change yours. 

Begin today by clicking the link on the bottom of the picture.




These meditations will lead you out of the darkness, keep you calm, and more focused. You will leave fear behind, become stronger, and never feel alone. Help heal your broken heart and ease your pain. As well as those who have suffered the injustice of another.

Be blessed,
I look forward to speaking with you.
Amilia Powers



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Saturday, August 8, 2020

What Have I Done?--Narcissist Abuse

 


WHAT HAVE I DONE?





To the outside world, I was "typical." A young woman, divorced, a mother of two small children-nothing really out of the ordinary. Getting married so young had led to getting divorced young. My husband and I both wanted to live different lives. It was an inevitable ending to something that had happened far too early in our lives. 

As I moved on with my life, I  struggled financially, but I was determined to make it. I knew what I wanted. I stayed focused, saved and purchased a home, only to realize that it took a lot of money to maintain that home. I had to get a second job to better support myself and provide for the kids. There were no other options and I wanted everything to work out. Yet, nothing was great. Working wasn't my problem. I wasn't afraid of hard work, I was more successful at attracting the wrong kind of men then I realized.

As time moved on and I met a man. He was wonderful and treated me the way every girl dreams of being treated. I mistook that for amazing love and unfortunately, it turned into pain and torment. My fear of letting go consumed me because I loved him and wanted it to work, all I felt and tried to hold onto was the day we met. I also had to settle for a second job that I didn't like, long dreadful hours that was physically exhausting but felt I needed. I wasn't happy. I was trying to keep up appearances. There was no balance or harmony in my life anywhere. Furthermore, knowing that I was responsible was agonizing. My life deteriorated and unraveled. I didn't like the person I turned into, becoming more distant from my life and never finding peace. I was just existing. 

I began journaling my everyday encounter with him. How it was impacting my life. Writing everything down in a journal was my release. I emptied my thoughts of emotional pain, and verbal abuse, helped me get through one more day. I needed to unload, and felt this was the only way to stay strong. 

It was that one day, I knew I had to admit to myself if I was going to become more invested in my life then just one more day I would need to take control of what is happening in my life. The stress was overwhelming, no rest. The kids were unhappy. I couldn't believe what I was writing in my journal. Who lives like this. Under these conditions of so much hostility, anger, and violence. 

I made this a habit in my life. Like waking up every day and brushing my teeth. You know when your life is spiraling out of control when you know what is going to happen the next day. There wasn't any joy to look forward to. This was the lowest point of my life. When the voices inside your head are screaming at you to make a change now. Not next week, next month. Today.

That one question that changed my life. "Is this the LIFE you dreamed of? 

From that day forward, my life did a 360 without hesitation. I believe I stuck it out as long as I could. There wasn't any change in sight. I hoped and prayed that whatever was going on with him would change, but it was getting worse. The memory I held onto of the day we first met faded away. 

When the relationship came to close, it was a violent ending to something that should have happened months ago. I wasn't frightened. I prayed and stayed in faith throughout the relationship and I believed that whatever was going to happen would be the best for me and my family.

Don't wait. Love is not unkind. Happiness and joy are apart of sharing. Always be honest with yourself. If you are not excited about your life and are treated in a way that drains your spirit, please make that change. Love is such a precious gift from God. No one has the right to take it. Let love, and faith guide your life, you can't make any mistakes with that. 

A part of this is written from my upcoming book "PAIN BEHIND BROKEN VASES" the book goes into more detail. This is a summary. It will definitely keep you at the edge of your seat. You will be in suspense throughout the novel. Check it out, by clicking the links below.



During this time of struggle, I was able to create "Personalize Meditations" that are helping thousands of woman across the country overcome obstacles they thought were impossible.

Start Now. Live the life you are created to live.



Join Me Today

If you are stuck join thousands of woman who have changed their lives with my "Personalize Meditations"

Click the link below the picture and act NOW, and
Follow the Four Simple Steps


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Be blessed, I look forward to hearing from you. 
Amilia Powers
                                                        




                                          coffeewithamilia@gmail.com




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Monday, July 20, 2020

Saying "NO" to a Narcissist



When it comes to an unhealthy relationship "NO" is the most important word.





I would like to say that I'm happy your here. You are taking the necessary steps to change your situation. Being in a place of hurt and pain is not the way you should live.

Saving yourself a life full of pain and misery, No is the most important word in your relationship. When you live with a narcissist your life depends on it. 

I understand that it is hard to believe that someone you love could or would abuse your generosity and take advantage of you. You can't fathom that being kind, and nice could attract someone this cruel in your life. 

We end up walking through life with this emotional pretense that this couldn't be happening to us. We continue sending ourselves warm thoughts that he didn't mean any harm or we miss understood his intentions just so we don't fall apart. 

I used to give him a pass on a regular bases. My thoughts were, If he's kind to me at times, then I can work with this and maybe make him see that we have something amazing and special. I developed a very hard time saying no and stopping the abuse. My courage facing him went to the waste side and I became very vulnerable. In reality, he wasn't able to share the love with me or anyone. I refused to give up and was determined to show him how wonderful life would be. It simply never occurred to me that I was heading down a path of destruction and pain.

Please Use the word "NO" every chance you get. This is a game changer for your life going forward. It validates who you are and what you will put up with. Without you putting your foot down, your life will be nothing but chaos. No, is the most powerful word used in any relationship. It sets the stage for your self-worth. Using this word takes you out of fear, and unleashes your power. The narcissist will not challenge you. You are not budging and he will eventually leave. He will get it through his thick skin he has no control over you, and as we all know they need to have control. That's what gives them power and gratification. They must have the spotlight. Don't worry your head, you left no room for arguments. You cleaned up this mess fairly quickly. 

I'm a woman who found herself in this position and used this through her darkest times. Waking up praising God, and asking for strength. I Never gave up hope and never giving up on me. I will not let you give up on you.

Having love in our lives is incredible. Don't waste another minute. There is nothing more exciting than a woman who is happy and has her voice. 

Reach out to me, and will guide you through the process. I will answer any questions or concerns you may have. I have turned my prayers into meditations, that are helping women across the country rise beyond their pain. 


Click the Link below. 





Have a blessed day
www.coffeewithamilia.com
www.valueurself.com
Reach out anytime. amiliapowers@gmail.com
Amilia Powers

Saturday, July 11, 2020

Narcissists are Bullies--Destructive Behavior


Don't Make Excuses For Their Actions



Narcissists are classic bullies. They will ambush you, and take you down without a moments notice. They will always blame you for their actions, and never take responsibility for what they are doing. They will deny that they are doing anything wrong and tell you it's all your fault. 

Narcissists are manipulators and have a way to turn the table upside down and unfortunately, it lands in your lap. Your thoughts become deep, and you begin to feel bad for them. They drain you emotionally and physically, you just give in because you are so exhausted.

Narcissists are cowards. They hide from what they are doing, by putting on a show to the outside world, an appearance of a stand-up man, a kind loving family man. Validation from people that they hold a higher power of love and happiness and kindness is a must.

Remember, you are short term for a narcissist. He knows he is going to leave on bad terms, they will cause destruction and you won't even know what happened, it's important he doesn't lose the sympathetic voice from the fake persona he portrayed in public. His mission is to make you look bad in all aspects of your life. He needs this power over you so people will come to his defenses. 

We made the mistake by not telling anyone how we feel or what is really happening in our lives. I know I have done this. I praised him in public, while I was abused emotionally and drained physically. Yes, to strangers, it looked like it was all my fault. What the hell was I thinking? I helped him set up ammunition against me.  His plan was in motion. I have to say I didn't see it coming. All I wanted was peace, that was my focus. I needed to get through the day, and not carry the pain with me.  

I spent many sleepless nights at the kitchen table. I needed to close my eyes just for a minute.  The thought of being in the same room with him put knots in my stomach, let alone sleeping in the same bed. Knowing what my day entailed I needed to take care of me. Yes, ladies, it was brutal. At this point, I couldn't wait until he left. I didn't even care what people thought of me. They weren't in my life, so it didn't matter anyway. I just wanted him gone. 

I wanted my life back the way it was. Having fun, smiling and enjoying the people I loved. I was finally being honest with myself and realized this isn't the way I wanted to live my life. This isn't what I imagined love was like. 

The day came when I felt strong. I didn't give him the opportunity to stay. I didn't feed off of his nasty energy. I spoke my mind. I stood up for myself. I was scared, but I had NO choice but to take control of my life or remain in shattered thoughts for the rest of my life. Looking over my shoulder, not knowing what was going to happen next. Definitely not the way to live.

He finally left with a trail of destruction behind him. He threw poison in the air from his words and continued shooting darts even after he left. I was so happy the demon left the building. I was thankful and grateful, excited to pick up my pieces. I knew I deserved a life of happiness. It felt amazing. The freedom, I embraced the world and everything in it. 

Ladies, please if you are reading this and it has any type of resemblance to your story. Please reach out. The cost of staying in a relationship without value becomes a lonely place. Remember how important your smile is to you. When was the last time you laughed so hard and your stomach hurt of joy??

Love is amazing. We all know how that feels, but the right type of love is very important. Don't waste another minute. There's nothing more exciting than a woman who is happy smiling and has her voice. 

Visit me. Learn more about me. 
I will answer any questions or concerns you may have.




Contact me at amiliapowers@gmail.com or visit my website www.coffeewithamilia.com

Leave me a message and the best time to reach you. www.valueurself.com

I look forward to speaking with you.
Have a blessed day

Amilia Powers


#amiliapowers #valueurself #coffeewithamilia 
#pain #toxicrelationship
#painfulrelationship #narcissist #narcissism 
#domesticviolence #narcissistabuse