Wednesday, March 27, 2019

It's Important to Stay Busy After Abuse--Narcissist



3 REASONS WHY YOU MUST STAY BUSY AFTER NARCISSISTIC ABUSE






Are there things you stopped doing while you were in a narcissistic relationship. Did you stop everything you enjoyed and loved because you knew in the back of your mind who you were dealing with and any wrong move would trigger a fight, argument or may even cause you physical or mental abuse? I know I did?

I have to tell you this isn't going to be easy, but it is something that needs to be done. It's difficult because we spent all our time and energy making him happy, and doing everything he said, we were virtually at his beck and call we forgot about ourselves. Understanding our position from this situation and to be able to transition into the you that once was will take time. We must allow ourselves to grieve and be angry. We are no longer invisible or hiding behind the shadow of pain. 


You are probably thinking to yourself. Now What?

1). The first thing you need to do is to reach out to everyone you can that you weren't allowed to have any communications with while you were with the Narcissist. You must apologize and explain what has happened in your life. Make sure you add that you are in a better phase in your life. You can go into as many details as you would like. I know from my experience talking about what happened helped me get through the trauma much easier with support. 

Even if your friends and family don't understand exactly why you had to stop talking to them. Most individuals will not understand this type of abuse if they have never been there themselves. Don't let this stop you from reaching out. This is a good start to getting your life in order. 

It's all about getting busy with your life. Learning to communicate all over again, and bringing back who you really are is a vital piece of what brings you peace. Laughing again, smiling again, sharing your thoughts and feelings that have been suppressed for months even years. All of us want to feel whole again. Rekindling relationships I feel is most important. You must collect your life. No matter what the outcome or what people think. Picking up where we left off is what we need to do. 


2). Get involved in group talks. Online or in person. Interacting, is all about healing. We should never stop learning. Read what others have gone through. Understand that you are not in this alone. This is essential for moving towards a life you are created to live. Learn that one man doesn't control the outcome of your life. This is the step that saved me a lifetime of grief. I became busy with my life. I wanted my identity back. I understood he wasn't my last stop, and being in love with him wasn't wrong, it was just the wrong person. 

I learned to be open to love. Take my time and heal through the process and not to date right away, there were more important things that needed to be dealt with first. I took three years before the thought of dating came to my mind. I was very active in my life that when the time came, not only did I meet a man, but I met the love of my life, a person of honor and kindness and happiness. Being busy and active in your life is a must. There is nothing more exciting than a woman who is smiling and joyous about her world. We tend to attract what we are feeling. 


3). Get busy with your health. You can do this slowly or jump right into a gym. We have been so bottled down with emotions, that our mind and body suffered. I know for me I didn't eat right. I didn't take care of myself when I was in an abusive relationship. I gained weight, and I became uncomfortable in my own skin.

I found the best medicine for me to cope with everything that was happening in my life was to exercise. I needed to clear my head of unwanted thoughts and emotions. It helped me gain the courage and power I lost for a long time. Being surrounded by people who have great energy and positive helps your mind feel that there isn't anything you can not do, I felt unstoppable. The only words that came to my inner voice were, "I Got This". 


We have the option to live an amazing life and have a wonderful loving relationship. The options that we must not allow are; Mistreatment, verbal, mental or physical abuse of any kind. Yes, one slap is physical abuse. This leads to more down the road. 

If you are making excuses for what you just read. Please Stop that right now. There are no excuses. There is nothing right about pain, hurt or any sort of torment. 

I'm a woman who's been through all of the things you are going through. A woman whose life was tossed and turned upside down. A woman's advice you can trust. A woman who found her way through darkest of times. A woman who woke up every morning praising God, and never stopped believing that I was meant to live a better life other than pain and misery. I praised him when I was cursed at, I praised him when I felt a hint of a smile and praised him when I was abused. He saw me through. I'm a woman just like you. I never gave up on me. 

Love is amazing. We all know how that feels, but the right type of love is very important. Don't waste another minute. There's nothing more exciting than a woman who is happy and has her voice, remember that. 

You can reach out to me, and I can help guide you through the process. I will answer any questions or concerns you may have.

I have created a series of four (4)Meditations, that can help you through your present situations. For more information, click the link below. 







I have created a special addition to my meditation practices. It is back from popular demand. It is "Personalized Meditations." 

These Meditations will lead you out of the darkness, keep you calm, and more focused. You will leave fear behind, become stronger, and never feel alone, help heal your broken heart and ease your pain. As well as those who have suffered the injustice of another.

Our meditations have changed the way people view healing and solving problems. We are excited to share this with you:

For more information about this, click the link below.


The biggest myth is people believing that they cannot shut off the noise long enough to meditate. Let me tell you a little secret. When the Meditation is personalized, you tune right into your life and solutions. There isn't any sound that will affect this. It is the most incredible experience you will ever have.

Be Blessed

I look forward to speaking with you.
Leave me a message, and the best time to reach you.

Amilia Powers
amiliapowers@gmail.com

Wednesday, March 20, 2019

Stop the Bully--Narcissist


Don't Make Excuses For Their Actions






Narcissists are classic bullies. They will ambush you, and take you down without a moments notice. They will always blame you for their actions, and never take responsibility for what they are doing. They will deny that they are doing anything wrong and tell you it's all your fault. 

Narcissists are manipulators and have a way to turn the table upside down and unfortunately, it lands in your lap. Your thoughts become deep, and you begin to feel bad for them. They drain you emotionally and physically, you just give in because you are so exhausted.

Narcissists are cowards. They hide from what they are doing, by putting on a show to the outside world, an appearance of a stand-up man, a kind loving family man. Validation from people that they hold a higher power of love and happiness and kindness is a must.

Remember, you are short term for a narcissist. He knows he is going to leave on bad terms, they will cause destruction and you won't even know what happened, it's important he doesn't lose the sympathetic voice from the fake persona he portrayed in public. His mission is to make you look bad in all aspects of your life. He needs this power over you so people will come to his defenses. 

We made the mistake by not telling anyone how we feel or what is really happening in our lives. I know I have done this. I praised him in public, while I was abused emotionally and drained physically. Yes, to strangers, it looked like it was all my fault. What the hell was I thinking? I helped him set up ammunition against me.  His plan was in motion. I have to say I didn't see it coming. All I wanted was peace, that was my focus. I needed to get through the day, and not carry the pain with me.  

I spent many sleepless nights at the kitchen table. I needed to close my eyes just for a minute.  The thought of being in the same room with him put knots in my stomach, let alone sleeping in the same bed. Knowing what my day entailed I needed to take care of me. Yes, ladies, it was brutal. At this point, I couldn't wait until he left. I didn't even care what people thought of me. They weren't in my life, so it didn't matter anyway. I just wanted him gone. 

I wanted my life back the way it was. Having fun, smiling and enjoying the people I loved. I was finally being honest with myself and realized this isn't the way I wanted to live my life. This isn't what I imagined love was like. 

The day came when I felt strong. I didn't give him the opportunity to stay. I didn't feed off of his nasty energy. I spoke my mind. I stood up for myself. I was scared, but I had NO choice but to take control of my life or remain in shattered thoughts for the rest of my life. Looking over my shoulder, not knowing what was going to happen next. Definitely not the way to live.

He finally left with a trail of destruction behind him. He threw poison in the air from his words and continued shouting darts even after he left. I was so happy the demon left the building. I was thankful and grateful, excited to pick up my pieces. I knew I deserved a life of happiness. It felt amazing. The freedom, I embraced the world and everything in it. 

Ladies, please if you are reading this and it has any type of resemblance to your story. Please reach out. The cost of staying in a relationship without value becomes a lonely place. Remember how important your smile is to you. When was the last time you laughed so hard and your stomach hurt of joy??

Love is amazing. We all know how that feels, but the right type of love is very important. Don't waste another minute. There's nothing more exciting than a woman who is happy smiling and has her voice. 

You can reach out to me, and I can help guide you through the process.
I will answer any questions or concerns you may have.




Contact me at amiliapowers@gmail.com or visit my website www.coffeewithamilia.com

Leave me a message and the best time to reach you. www.valueurself.com

I look forward to speaking with you.
Have a blessed day
Amilia 

Friday, March 15, 2019

3 Reasons A Narcissist Leaves--Painful Exits


This is your LUCKY BREAK, but hard for you to realize it



A narcissist needs to destroy everyone in their path. They feed off of destruction. A narcissist must feel good about themselves at all times. The world revolves around them. I know this first hand. I stayed with a narcissist for about three years, and he tried and did everything in his demonly powers to destroy me and my family.

He knew I caught on to him. I made it clear how I felt and I didn't care if he left. I knew he was planning an exit and I had a feeling he wasn't going without making it dramatic and causing a world of grief and trouble. I knew I had to pray and allow the good Lord to take the lead. I was willing to accept anything that the narcissist was willing to dish out. I was frightened and safe at the same time if that makes any sense. I just wanted him out of my life.

I mistook a man treating me kindly, but what came with him was unfortunate pain and misery torment that he laid onto me and my family. There was no harmony, I was physically exhausted. He knew I was onto him being with another woman, and setting himself up for his exit. He needed to make his final debut so he could cry victim and for his next woman to feel sorry for him, and for the outside world to believe he was in distress. I couldn't thank the Lord enough for answering my prayers. The greatest gift he gave me was my freedom to laugh and smile that I missed so much. The Lord held my hand through it all.

I never looked back, nor did I care what he did or who he was with. There were no words that can adequately describe the liberation I felt. I was inspired and freed. Through our uncertainty, we can identify what we do not want in our lives. We are all born with intuition. It is a guiding force that works when we pay attention. For me, I tuned right in.

1. A narcissist leaves because his work is done with you. He's not feeding off your hurt and pain. He needs to move on and find his next victim, and hope at the same time you will be begging for him to come back. He needs attention. You're not willing to participate in the life the narcissist created. You will not accept his demands and refuse to be controlled. These are his biggest assets.

2. A narcissist will blame you for everything that happened in the relationship and see the relationship as broken. You do not accept his insults and he sees you no longer want him in your life.
You're tired of the blame game and the nasty remarks that you know in your heart only make him feel good about himself. He tells you that you're selfish, and demanding. That you don't appreciate anything. He hates you. You're needy and don't make him happy.

3. A narcissist ends his relationship by scare tactics. He throws things and strikes objects to frighten you. He will make sure he breaks your valuable items to punish you. He could file false charges against you, report you to child services and threaten your family at the same time. He will break your phone while you are calling for help. He can go as far as harming you physically. He does all of this just leave by playing the victim.

I was finished having any love or friendship with this man months before he left, and all he had to do was pack up and leave. Ladies, unfortunately, a narcissist will never leave without trying to harm you in some way. Please do whatever you can and inform your family and friends with everything that is happening in your life. Let them know the details so they can be there for you to help you in any way they can.

This is not the time to cover up and act as if everything is alright, or that you can do this on your own.
I can tell you this. You can't do this on your own. You will need assistance.

I'm here if you would like to talk. You can leave me a message at www.valueurself.com
and pick the best time that works for you. I will answer any questions you might have.

I'm a woman just like you. A woman who made mistakes with her heart and has been through the same situation you are going through. I'm a woman who is willing to help you and guide you to a life you are created to live.

Love is amazing. We all know how this feels but the right kind of love is very important. Don't waste another minute. I'm thankful and grateful to be a part of all of your lives.

You can also contact me at amiliapowers@gmail.com and visit my website: www.coffeewithamilia.com






I have created a series of four (4) Meditations, that can help you through this situation. 
For more information, click on the link below.

https://valueurself.com/collections/meditation-mp3s


I have created a special addition to my meditation practices. It is back from popular demand. It is "Personalized Meditations."


These meditations will lead you out of the darkness, keep you calm, and more focused. You will leave fear behind, become stronger, and never feel alone, help heal your broken heart and ease your pain. As well as those who have suffered the injustice of another. 

Our meditations have changed the way people view healing and solving problems. We are excited to share this with you:

For more information about this, click the link below.

The biggest myth is people believing that they cannot shut off the noise long enough to meditate. Let me tell you a little secret. When the Meditation is personalized, you tune right into your life and solution. There isn't any sound that will affect this. It is the most incredible experience you will ever have.


https://valueurself.com/collections/personalized-meditations


Be Blessed,

I look forward to speaking with you.
Leave me a message, and the best time to reach you.

Amilia Powers

Sunday, March 10, 2019

Are You in an Abuse Relationship??--Narcissist


Have you ever paused to consider how painful it sounds when you describe your relationship?





That one day when you wake up that reminds you of the pain that is still obvious. The tears that roll down your face, and the uneasy feeling in your stomach that aches so bad. Your life is being overwhelmed, and you're lying there numb. You don't want to start your day. You want to go back to bed, close your eyes, and have a dream that takes you far away from all this pain, the reality that your living. 

All that is running through your mind is that you wish the hurt you're feeling will go away. The pain has absorbed all your day, and sleepless nights. You wish it was a bad dream and all of this will go away when you opened your eyes. Questions come up, what have I done wrong? What should I have done differently? You go on and on, day after day, playing tug of war with your heart. 

You know you must shake it off,  and find the strength and power to begin your day. You're praying to forgive him but deep down inside all you feel is a dislike for the monster who has caused your days to start off in darkness. You keep praying and hoping for the burden that you hold in your heart will be released. 

You're tired of the reminders. Everywhere you go; the clothes you wear, your hairstyle, even the lipstick he thought looked amazing on you. This emptiness that you're feeling is turned on no matter what you do. You don't want to feel broken anymore. You wish it was a bad dream and all of this will go away.

You walk through your day watching people intermingle with each other, laughing and talking about events coming up in their lives. They are excited and joyous about life. You are happy for them, but at the same time, you do what you can to avoid those conversations. You feel so disconnected from your present life. You refuse to cause yourself more agony with memories that you hold so dear. 

Our emotions run wild during pain. Our body goes through a great ordeal. One minute your OK and the next your in tears, and your body becomes tense or anxious. Then you have days you take out your frustrations on everyone and everything. This is all normal. Your feelings are coming to the surface that you have suppressed for many days, months and years. 

When the time is right you will be able to apologize to everyone who has taken the brunt of your pain. Please do not forget to apologize to yourself. Know that this is not your fault. Understand that hurt, mistreatment, and abuse does not deserve a place in your life. You have no room for this. 

Remember you are stronger than you know, you are reading this, aren't you?  You believe in you, and what you stand for. You know you have a lot of Love, Joy, and Faith to share with the world and one man doesn't have the power to control this, he can't dictate the rest of your life. 

The cost of staying in a relationship without value becomes a lonely place. Remember how important your smile is to you. When is the last time you laughed so hard where those stomach pains were joyous? 

You are a valuable woman that deserves to be treated with a kind voice, and love with the utmost respect. 

Love is amazing. We all know how this feels but the right kind of love is very important. Don't waste another minute. 

There is nothing more exciting than a woman who is happy, smiling and has her voice. You will find yourself attracting the same type of kindness. I'm thankful and grateful every day for the good times and for the bad times. It brought me to where I'm today


You can reach out to me, and I can help guide you. 
I will answer any questions you may have

Contact me at amiliapowers@gmail.com or visit my website www.coffeewithamilia.com
Leave me a message and the best time to reach you at www.valueurself.com,
click Let's Talk at the bottom of the website. 




I have created a series of four (4) Meditations, that can help you through this situation, these were my prayers turned into meditations.

These meditations will lead you out of the darkness, keep you calm, and more focused. You will leave fear behind, become stronger, and never feel alone, help heal your broken heart and ease your pain. As well as those who have suffered the injustice of another.


For more information, click on the link below.


https://valueurself.com/collections/meditation-mp3s



I have created a special addition to my meditation practices. It is back from popular demand. It is "Personalized Meditations." 

Our meditations have changed the way people view healing and solving problems. We are excited to share this with you:


For more information about this, click the link below.



The biggest myth is people believing that they cannot shut off the noise long enough to meditate. Let me tell you a little secret. When the Meditation is personalized, you tune right into your life and solution. There isn't any sound that will affect this. It is the most incredible experience you will ever have.



https://valueurself.com/collections/personalized-meditations


Be blessed,

I look forward to speaking with you.

Leave me a message, and the best time to reach you.

Amilia Powers



#coffeewithamilia #valueurself #amiliapowers

Friday, March 1, 2019

Let's Talk Out Loud--Narcissistic ABUSE





I've started a Closed Group for women where we can share our feelings, concerns, and the pain we hold in our hearts.

Nothing changes unless we change our circumstances. No-one is going to do it for us.
I can not express enough, that you need guidance, you can't do this alone, especially when there are 
children involved.
Making a change is never easy, it can be very scary but we have to do what is best for ourselves and our family.
We will never know what life feels like if we remain in an abusive lifestyle. There comes a time, we have to make a choice, and take responsibility for what is happening in our lives, and make it better. We have to have control over our lives.
The power is ours.
This is a private group I am inviting you to join. Click the Link below and join me in a discussion. We will become stronger together.


Have a Blessed Day

Amilia