When your life is in Survival Mode after Pain that leaves you broken
First I would like to say that I'm happy your here. Breaking up is never easy, especially under these conditions. Confusion and self-doubt begin to set in our hearts. Dealing with a narcissist during a break-up takes all the energy out of you.
1. The first stage of healing a broken heart after narcissistic abuse is disconnecting and staying your distance from the abuser and everything that surrounds them, which means everyone who is a part of him. Yes, this must be done. Space from the pain that was caused helps you get a clear understanding of the cruelty you dealt with.
This is a delicate stage. During trauma, our thoughts are all over the place. We want them back, we hate them. We want justice for our sanity. We lose sleep, we forget to eat. Stop me if I'm wrong.
Please, ladies, collect your thoughts. Stop the shame, and the blame game. You are giving him all the power he is asking for. You're giving him full control over your entire world. You are not allowing yourself to feel what is real. That he doesn't deserve you. He is not worthy to hear your voice. Most importantly you don't deserve to be abused by him. This is the reality. You have given this demon too much credit. Why don't we start with you?
You are a survivor and you will heal. You will not go back and any thought of this is erased from your inner soul. You love who you are and will treat yourself with the utmost respect and never allow anyone to mistreat you from this day forward. Repeat.
Begin every verse by saying, "I'm a powerful woman and I will get through this. I'm a survivor and stronger than I've ever been before. I have overcome.
2. The second most important part of surviving after abuse is believing that life is better without him. That life with him was cruel. Your life with him had no joy or happiness and everything you did ended up with painful punishment that you didn't deserve. You must believe that being tormented and abused day after day isn't the way you want to live your life.
Believing in yourself worth is a big game-changer. This means, standing up for yourself. Being strong enough to say the magic two-letter word NO, I'm not having it. Scaring him half to death with your power that he can not approach you in any way but respectfully or he needs to step aside. You will not put up with any unkindness bottom line.
Remember, you dictate how the relationship goes. You have more strength than he does. We forget all about that when he is giving us a line of bullishit. That's all that it is and believe it or not we know it, and dismiss it and what comes with it is a world of grief.
Listen carefully to what you believe. Believe in yourself first. Believe that you deserve to live a life of love, joy, and happiness. Believe that you do and it will come to pass. Most Importantly believe he doesn't fall into your belief system. Amen to that.
I'm a woman whose life was darkened. My entire life was shattered in a million pieces. A woman's advice you can trust. I never gave up hope. I woke up every day in praise, thanking God in my good times and my bad. I never gave up on me, and I will never give up on you.
Having love in our lives is amazing. We all know how that feels, but the right type of love is very important. Don't waste another minute. There's nothing more exciting than a woman who is happy and has her voice.
You can reach out to me, and I can help guide you through the process. I will answer any concerns you may have.
Click the link below. Learn more about me.
I look forward to speaking with you.
Have a blessed day
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